July 2008

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On behalf of our Board of Director’s and the thousands of people with lupus that we serve: Thank You! We are so grateful for all the hard work that goes into hosting such a wonderful event as the Dan McCarty Golf Classic. The final figures are not yet tabulated…but I suspect that this year will be better than ever. 

Please let everyone in the family know, along with everyone who golfed or helped at the event, as well as all the Metro readers how much we appreciate everything that you do for the Lupus Alliance. 

-Chuck Pottenger


Metro Gas Prices

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A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in our country? Well, there's a very simple answer. Nobody bothered to check the oil. We just didn't know we were getting low. The reason for that is purely geographical. Our OIL is located in Alaska, California, Coastal Florida, Coastal Louisiana, Kansas, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, and Texas, but our 
DIPSTICKS are located in Washington, DC !!! 
Quik Puzzles

1. What's this?



  2. What's this?



3. Figure out what is this 4 letter word from the following rhyme... 
My first is in father but not in dad.
My second in lass and also lad.
My third is in low but not in we.
My last in live but not in be.
If in my whole no one believes.
For thirteen weeks I'll give you leaves.
4. Kristen forgot her driver's license at home. She was traveling down a one way street in the wrong direction and did not stop at an intersection to let pedestrians go. A policeman was watching her, but did not give her a ticket. Why?  Answer


This Issue's Writers & Contributors

Mike Borelli, Gerry Bufalini, Jeff Cable, Jerry McCarty, Kelly McCarty, Kristen McCarty, Larry McCarty, Margaret McCarty, Mike McCarty, Steve McCarty, John Murray, Ron Patlewicz, Millard Pickney, Chuck Pottenger, Marianne Santarossa, Denise Sidor, Amanda Westfall


Q. Which famous female ice skater was the first to successfully land a triple axel in a competition? 

Your Name:


Last Month's Answer

What team in the 4 major sports leagues (MLB, NBA, NHL, NFL) was the first to be named after an insect?

Charlotte Hornets

Congratulations To...

Jerry McCarty, Larry Wendt,
John Karalis, Jonathan Woodson, Mike L.

Caption Contest
Submit an interesting or funny caption for this photo


Last Month's Captions

 Nice fu ...so what's the deal with the Halter Top????
 Warning!!! My Gay-dar is overloading. 
 We're almost there. Another month or two and we'll have that Brad Savage look.
 The Village People Where are they now?
 Conform, conform, CONFORM!
 Butt-less chaps today?
 It's not a beauty parlor, it's a male salon.
 Lovely blouse, Steve
 The Holy One says Canada is ready for the new BTO
 "What after shave shall we use Jeff?"
Secret Celebrity
Can you recognize our secret celebrity?



Last Month's Celebrity Was....

The Monkees

Congratulations to:

Lynne Bucciarelli


An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'  The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing. The doctor was shocked! 'You asked your neighbor?' The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.' 
OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet 

Solution to the Balance of Trade Deficit
OPEC sells oil for $136.00 a barrel. OPEC nations buy U.S. grain at $7.00 a bushel. Solution: Sell grain for $136.00 a bushel. Can't buy it?  Tough!   Eat your oil! Ought to go well with a nice thick grilled filet of camel butt!!!



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