- Get your clubs out and sign up for The Dan McCarty Golf Classic
- Learn all about safe handling of your Easter eggs this year
- You might be surprised to find out what teachers make in this issue
- Those with a sweet tooth might do well in this months' quiz
- The McCarty Metro looks back at Big Time Wrestling and The Sheik
- There's no doubt about it... My parents drugged me when I was little
- Steve O. peruses a new preamble to the Constitution of the United States
Aw C'mon! The McCarty Metro
ain't that boring... is it?
3. What is the next word in the following series: aid, nature, world, estate, column, sense ...?
(a) water (b) music,
(c) welcome (d) heaven
4. If you use the same three letters in the same order before and after the given letters, you will get a very dirty word! What is the word?
_ _ _ ERGRO _ _ _
April Trivia Question
How many different letters of the alphabet are not in the name of any state of the United States?
What Grammy award winning band was named after a brand of tissue?
The Statler Brothers
Congratulations to: Gwenda
A NEW FEATURE IN THE METRO! EACH MONTH, I WILL AS A NEW QUESTION. I WOULD LIKE EVERYONE TO TAKE A SECOND AND VOTE. REMEMBER, PEOPLE HAVE DIED FOR YOUR RIGHT TO VOTE IN THIS MCCARTY METRO ELECTION. I WILL POST THE RESULTS IN THE NEXT MONTH'S METRO.
APRIL QUESTION: We've all taken car trips with the family. We've all gone cruising with your buddies. We've all secretly sang songs in the car when we're all alone. Here is your chance to vote for your favorite songs to sing in the car.
|ADD YOUR 2 CENTS
|Hey Kelly, I loved the animated bunny - it took me a few minutes, but I figured it out! Too fun! -Lynne B.
ED NOTE: Thanks Lynne... hope you keep coming back for more hare-raising fun.
|Dear Editor: Great Metro, but could have done w/o the picture of the haggas. YUCK! -Mrs. Steve O
|ED NOTE: As the only Scottish McCarty, I thought you would appreciate a good home-cooked meal. Maybe I was wrong
Hey Uncle Editor: I appreciate you posting our date; however, there is one little problem. Our wedding is actually on Saturday, August 18th, not the 17th. While this may ensure that everyone arrives in time, it could cause some confusion. -Sara
ED NOTE: Damn this whole daylight savings time. I am totally messed up!!! My apologies.
Ed: Can I still call up the "Battle of the Bell(es)" story? I have a friend who rings handbells and I'd like to send it to him. I tried the search on the Metro but couldn't find it. It says could not be found. But I also tried Jerry's World and it said could not be found. Should I try something else? Thanks, A Fan(atic)
ED NOTE: I pulled out your battle, but I have put all the remaining issues in a very safe, secure, and completely waterproof black box. This way, they won't get wet or wrinkled like they would if I just left them out on the web. Also, in case the Metro crashes, they should still be able to retrieve the black box from the rubble. See... I'm thinkin' now, boy!
APRIL METRO STAFF
bob balch, gerry bufalini, carole hepper, jerome klotz
jerry mccarty, kelly mccarty, kristen mccarty
margaret mccarty, mike mccarty, steve mccarty
gwenda perez, millard pickney, jason peach, chuck pottenger
barbara potter, matt rzepka, denise sidor
|METRO JOKE O' THE MONTH
The new Supermarket near our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and smell the scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
(1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend
(3) And when you're in deep dudu, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
|OUR NEWEST METRO CORPORATE SPONSORS
Tabo & Jabo's first magazine cover
was not all that flattering!
I WONDER WHAT THE POOR PEOPLE ARE EATIN'
|Pizza Hut's Canadian Pizza
• Bacon (so far so good)
• Pepperoni (Talk to me)
• Corn (???)
• Thousand Island Sauce (Huh?? Since when
|does Thousand Island Sauce represent Canada? I think I'll stick with the Supreme, thank you!!!)
Advice for the older folk who read the Metro
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.
When the Angels are fighting the "Creepy Thin Man," right before Drew Barrymore lifts up Lucy Liu to spin her around and kick the thin man, to get Lucy's attention, Drew hollers out "Lucy!" even though Lucy Liu's character's name is Alex.
On Your Birth Date in Music
This site asks the question, "What song was No. 1 on the day you were born"? Of course, you can put in any date and get results, so if you want to look up what was No. 1 on the day your first child was born or on your wedding day, etc., you can.
Don't be surprised if somewhere, some day, when you least expect it, someone comes up to you and says...
The McCarty Metro