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Protecting The
Ones You Love

Know if there are sexual predators living in your neighborhood
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www.familywatchdog.us

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METRO EXCLUSIVE!!!

On October 29, 2006
Sara McCarty & Robbie Brookfield got engaged!
Details to follow...


Hot Off The Wire

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METRO GAS PRICES

Is Your Area Not Represented Above?
Click Here To Find The Best Gas Prices In Your Neighborhood

2006 Christmas Name Draw Results

Steve drew Andy
Kristen drew Karen
Jerry drew Kelly
Kathlene drew Kristen
Kelly drew Rick
Margaret drew Carla
Larry drew Jerry
Carla drew Missy
Rick drew Mike
DP drew Ryan
Mike drew Larry
Karen drew Kathlene
Andy drew Scott
Ann drew Erin
Ryan drew DP
Missy drew Margaret
Scott drew Steve
Erin drew Ann

Metro Quick PuzzlesMetro Trivia Challenge

1. What does this mean?


Answer

2. What does this mean?


Answer

3. What do the following words have in common? DEFT, FIRST, CALMNESS, CANOPY, LAUGHING, STUPID, HIJACK.  Answer

4. If 5 people can sew 5 dresses in 5 days... How many people will it take to sew 50 dresses in 50 days?  Answer

5. A man found himself in a downpour. Not only didn't he have an umbrella, he had no hat or any other object to place over his head. Nor was there any shelter around. Yet his hair didn't get the slightest bit wet. Can you explain why? Answer

6. If you had a piece of paper that was 0.001 inch thick, approximately how tall a pile would it make if it was doubled fifty times? Answer

November Trivia Question
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What state has the largest water coastline?

Name:
Answer: ......

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October Results
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What current popular cartoon character was first introduced in the 1930's wearing buttoned pants, and ever since has decided to go au naturale (pantless)?

Donald Duck
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Congratulations to:
Jerry McCarty, Meg, Buck Tuffiti
John Karalis, and Poppy

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Dear Ed. I got a rock! -Charlie Brown
ED NOTE: GOOD GRIEF!
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Editor... The candle thing (last month) was interesting.  It would have been better if the little kid would have taken the candle and held it up to his butt, farted, and lit the other three.
ED NOTE: Not to spill the beans, but Peanut & Jocko got that bit saved for for our "sweeps" edition of the McCarty Metro.
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SOUND OFF TO THE METRO!

Name:.
Comments:.

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Dear Editor. I just read about the Stingray that jumped into a boat and stabbed that guy with its barbed tail. I remember back in 1966, I was riding a Stingray, slipped off the seat and landed on that bar. I was wondering if it is just a coincidence this happening 40 years apart? -Still walking funny
ED NOTE: Wow... You just gave me a chill. I can picture Rod Serling telling that story on.... THE TWILIGHT ZONE!
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Dear Editor, I have a historical question. Who was the first one to come up with the idea to stuff bread crumbs up a dead birds butt... and then eat it? -Not that there's anything wrong with that.
ED NOTE: I'm glad you axed that question, me being kind of a history buff, and an aficionado of animals. It is the same person who was hungry and said "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt." And to wash it down, looked at a cow and said, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly penis-like things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
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Dear McCarty Metro, I noticed the pictures of Austin McCarty with two babes sitting on his lap. Is that Dance Dance Revolution a babe magnet or what?? I thought memorizing the pattern for Pac Man was a good way to get chicks. -George Clooney

ED NOTE: I'm telling you right now... Girls go for the dancers. Just look at Jerry Springer in "Dancing With The Stars". Talk about a chick magnet??
 

 

...ED NOTE: Sorry Margaret!  I couldn't help myself!

AT THE BAR OF RUSSO'S WEDDING...


What really irritates me about women is the
way they always leave the toilet seat down!

METRO QUOTE o' THE MONTH
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Don't try to balance the budget.
Try to balance the earth!

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-Bill Gutowski

Submit A Quote For Next Month's Metro

Name:
Quote:

Metro Caption ContestMetro Secret Celebrity Contest
Come up with a unique caption for this picture.
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Send Me Your Caption

Name:
Caption:

 

Last Month's Picture & Captions

At least he positioned the hats correctly
Mike McCarty can't get used to wearing swimming trunks since his days in McKenzie High School's swim class.
At least we can tell that it isn't a McCarty 
Speedy Gonzalez ran up this naked guys legs 
Name: Say Hello to my little friend!!
Anyone for chips and dip? 
Have you seen mine...cause I've Seņors
Now that's using your head... I mean... oh never mind
Not many people can pull off that outfit...my hat's off to ya
wow, look at that guy...he must have the biggest nose."
One question...where does he keep his keys?
That's SOME-brero all right.
one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor
So... is this the forbidden Mexican hat dance?
Aftermath of the Cockroach's first tour of Mexico
Do you ever get that feeling when you first wake up: it's gonna be a really bad / good day?
I hat the weirdest dream
It's a Mexican sun dial: when the big shadow gets to 4 and the little shadow gets to 12, it's happy hour.

Name this famous (or maybe not-so-famous) person?
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Secret Celebrity
Your Name:

Celebrity:

Last Month's Secret Celebrity

Rodney Dangerfield

Congratulations to:
Jerry McCarty, Steve O, Lake Speed, Jerry, Chuck
Buck Tuffiti, and L. Wendt

At least we can agree on one thing...
IT'S TURKEY SEASON!!!


From The November
McCarty Metro Staff

Robert Balch, Poppy Barsotti, Mike Borelli, Gerry Bufalini
Bill Gutowski, Jerome Klotz, Mary Jo Mack, Amanda McCarty
Chris McCarty, Jerry McCarty, Kelly McCarty, Kristen McCarty
Larry McCarty, Lauren McCarty, Margaret McCarty, Mike McCarty
Sara McCarty, Steve McCarty, Gwenda Perez, Millard Pickney
Chuck Pottenger, Todd Rammler, Rick Reilly, John Russo
Mary Anne Santarosa, Denise Sidor, Larry Wendt, Jonathan Woodson

November Joke 'o The Month

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your Duck, Cuddles has passed away." The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? " "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. 

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150," she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!!" The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry but if you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan it's now $150.00." 

DON'T FORGET TO VOTE
NOVEMBER 7th

How Gossip Got Started

Early politicians required feedback from the public to determine what the people considered important. Since there were no telephones, TV's or radios, the politicians sent their assistants to local taverns, pubs, and bars. They were told to "go sip some ale" and listen to people's conversations and political concerns. Many assistants were dispatched at different times. "You go sip here" and "You go sip there." The two words "go sip" were eventually combined when referring to the local opinion and, thus we have the term "gossip."

Our Family & Friends Sites

McCarty Metro Chat Room

Group Chat Every Sunday At 9 PM EDT

CHAT NOW!

FACT OR FICTION?
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The original Thanksgiving Day feast took place in October. It was moved to November to coincide with the Detroit Lions schedule. Canadians, however, still celebrate Thanksgiving in October, while celebrating the Grey Cup in November.


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ALL YOU WANNA-BE HUNTERS...

PRACTICE YOUR SHOOTING
ONLY ON THE McCARTY METRO

Link o' The Month

DEAL OR NO DEAL
This is so much fun

http://nbc.com/Deal_or_No_Deal/game/dond.swf

Don't be surprised if somewhere, some day, when you least expect it, someone comes up to you and says...

SMILE!
You're On The McCarty Metro

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