November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005 - November 2005

Last Month's Paparazzi (want to download a picture, click on the rotating film to go to download page, or click here)
Can't view the slideshow? For Internet Explorer, you can download java capabilities at

Gas Prices For Your Area & Construction Information
.Detroit Traffic
LA Traffic
US Traffic

A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in America. Well, there's a very simple answer. Nobody bothered to check the oil. We just didn't know we were getting low. The reason for that is purely geographical. Our OIL is located in Alaska, California, Oklahoma, and 
TEXAS. Our DIPSTICKS are located in Washington DC.

Metro Blast From The Past - 1967

The Birthday Event Of The Year - Coquette Maggard

Off The Wire

Christmas Name Drawing
More info available on the News page.  Here are the pairings.

Steve drew Jerry
Kristen drew Erin
Jerry drew Scott
Kathlene drew Karen
Kelly drew Andy
Margaret drew Kristen
Larry drew Rick
Carla drew Kathlene
Rick drew Kelly
Scott drew Ryan
Erin drew Margaret
Dennis drew Mike
Mike drew Steve
Karen drew Carla
Andy drew Dennis
Ann drew Missy
Ryan drew Larry
Missy drew Ann

Quick Puzzles (bet you don't know them)This Month's Trivia Contest
1.  What 3 letters change a girl into a woman? Answer
What common English verb becomes its own past tense by rearranging its letters? Answer
3. What goes around the world and stays in a corner? Answer
4. The following clues each form a unique word by themselves, add them together to get the name of a country. Example: blue and yellow mixed + solid ground = green + land = Greenland 
A. something that will make you sick + an indefinite number Answer
B. half of the width of an em + an organ for secreting Answer
C. a swindle + to move or travel Answer
D. an animalís shelter + a visible sign Answer
What pro-bowl current NFL player was once a former Major League starting pitcher in the National League?

Know The Answer???


Metro Sound Off - Letters To The Editor
Hey, what's the big idea of falling leaves on the front page of the Metro?  Do you realize the pile of leaves I had to rake up from under my computer by the time I finished reading the front page?- Tired Of Raking
ED NOTE: If you didn't like raking your computer, you sure are not gonna be happy with my winter edition of the Metro.

Dear Editor. Your god-daughter started catechism this past Monday. Good news is, she wants to go again next Monday :) -Kristen
ED NOTE: Really? Are you sure she is a McCarty?

Send Me Your 2 Cents Worth

Re: #14 & #9 in the Sixty Uses of Salt on your Kitchen Page last month. Is it true that combining these techniques also works if you wish to conceive a male child? -Chiquita B. Nana
ED NOTE: As a father of 3 boys... Absotively

I know that this issue was very tough for you, and once again, you most likely did a great deal of it yourself. But, I enjoyed still. The MM is one of life's little pleasures one can always count on to make us smile, laugh, or groan. (thanks' P & J) In conclusion, I WILL NOT cancel my subscription this month. -Raiff
ED NOTE: Thanks

I enjoyed reading your Traveling Link of the Month on the CN Tower.  It was filled with interesting bits of info.  However, as a male, I was disappointed not to be visually stimulated as well.  I almost felt like driving to Toronto to see it for myself.  Since gas prices too high, would it be possible just to include a picture of the Tower in the next edition of the Metro instead?  Thanks--Craven Moorehead
ED NOTE: I was hesitant at first, because the censors thought my picture was a bit crude, but I figured, "What the Flip", I'll show it anyway. (Sorry, but one of our Metro readers, Pee Pee Rodriguiz, was caught in the foreground taking a whizz into the river.)

Another great job K.  Next time color the gray on my hair. -Steve O
ED NOTE: Note to Mike. I got a gift idea for your little brother. Silly Putty and black Magic Markers. 

Hi Kelly, Sleepless tonight, I stumbled across your website. Very cool. I'm a McCarty too, of the Brooklyn variety, although I never lived there. Have a look at my tasteless yet funny website: See ya. -John McCarty

 Kelly, Glad you came over to Mom's. I enjoyed pickin' with you. Man, you're good at those endings! (Really, thanks for coming over on a moment's notice. You made Jill's day -- and mine -- with your bluegrass cracks. -Mike
ED NOTE: As far as the cracks... I learned from the best. I watched a lot of Junior Sample out in the hay field on Hee Haw.

Hey ... I was glad to see The Fonz pictured on the top page of the October Metro. -Richie The C.
ED NOTE: HEEEEYYYYY!!!! Due to the recent clamor, the McCarty Metro has decided to come out with a Steve-O action figure, complete with the gray side burns. 

In last months Metro, you dismissed a reader who asked if you shopped at Montgomery Wards by saying, "No", you shopped at the much more classy Hughes & Hatcher.  If my memory was correct you were a regular purchaser of clothes from Yankee's Department Store, The Swank Shop, Federal's and YES!  Monkey Wards.  Get the facts right.  This is Journalism Damn it. -Lou Grant
ED NOTE: Ok, I admit it. Add to the list though, K Mart, Goodwill, and my older brothers drawers.


Thank you for the nice words about Alek. He was the light of my life and will forever be my entire heart. Please thank Brad for his friendship to Alek. -Marianne (Alek's Mom)
ED NOTE: I speak for Brad, as well as our entire family when I say how much Alek will be missed. God Bless.

Cartoon From The Street

Laziest dog I've ever had....


My wife claims I'm a basball fanatic. She says all I ever read about is baseball. All I ever talk about is baseball. All I ever think about is baseball. I told her she's way off base.
Vampires are always looking for their necks victim.
Two keys hang in an undertaker's office; one for the organ in the chapel; the other for one of the cars in the garage. Two small signs above the keys read: "Hymn" and "Hearse."
I haven't slept in days. But I've been sleeping great at night.
Tubby or not tubby, fat is the question.
Bragging: The patter of tiny feats.
Birds are grouchy in the morning because their bills are over dew.
Consummate: To pull the wool over the eyes of a spouse.
The food at the school cafeteria isn't awful. It's "digestively challenged."
An ex-baseball player spoke about his new diet drink. "You mix two jiggers of Scotch to one jigger of Metrecal. So far he's lost five pounds and his driver's license."

Our Family & Friends SitesAdd Your Site's Link To The Metro

Want to add your site to our Family & Friends suggestions?
Simple send me an e-mail with the information, and I'll be glad to add it.

This Month's Staff

Gerard Bufalini
Jerry McCarty
Kelly McCarty

Kristen McCarty
Larry McCarty
Margaret McCarty
Mike McCarty
Chris Rzepka
Denise Sidor
Joke o' The Month

Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night. The waiter came and took their drink order. "I would like a Sprite," said the first little piggy. "I would like a Coke," said the second little piggy. "I want beer, lots and lots of beer," said the third little piggy. 

The drinks were brought out and the waiter took their orders for dinner. "I want a nice big bowl of oatmeal," said the first piggy. "I would like the salad plate," said the second piggy. "I want beer, lots and lots of beer," said the third little piggy. 

The meals were brought out and a while later the waiter approached the table and asked if the piggies would like any dessert. "I want a banana split," said the first piggy. "I want a root beer float," said the second piggy. "I want beer, lots and lots of beer," exclaimed the third little piggy. 

"Pardon me for asking," said the waiter to the third little piggy, "but why have you only ordered beer all evening?" The third piggy says - - - -

"Well, somebody has to go 'Wee, wee, wee, all the way home!" 

Traveling Link Of The Month

Las Vegas, Nevada

Las Vegas is the gambling capital of the United States. The famous Vegas Strip is where you'll find some of the most spectacular hotels and casinos in the world. In between rolling the dice, you can catch a show with long-legged show girls or rare royal white tigers. And the entertainment doesn't stop. At night, the neon lights set the city aglow as far as the eye can see.

For more information, visit...

Link Of The Month

Look up your old high school yearbook pictures

To The Metro

What Are You Waiting
For Anyway?


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Detroit, MI 48228

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