It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Peanut




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Peanut & Jocko

Election Fallout

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The Month Of
November In Pictures


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time of
the  year
brings out
more feelings
of warmth and
good wishes to all.
You and those you love
will be part  of our prayers
during this 2004 holiday season.
You... have made miracles possible.
You... have given hope to those without hope.
You... have lighted a candle in defiance of the darkness.


Christmas Name Draw

  • Steve drew Larry
  • Kristen drew Missy
  • Jerry drew Rick
  • Kathlene drew Carla
  • Kelly drew Ryan
  • Margaret drew Karen
  • Larry drew Mike
  • Carla drew Ann
  • Rick drew Andy
  • Dennis drew Kelly
  • Mike drew Jerry
  • Karen drew Kristen
  • Ryan drew Dennis
  • Missy drew Margaret
  • Andy drew Steve
  • Ann drew Kathlene
Hello Friends and Family,
We've updated our family website with lots of photos of Dana and Evan as well as the latest family news! HAPPY HOLIDAYS! - Jerry, Kathlene, Dana and Evan

Gas Prices For Your Areas

Quick Puzzles

To get you ready for the Trivia Contest below, and the monthly Metro Quiz inside, here is a quick puzzle to sharpen your noggin.

If eels + mark + best + wary = easy
What does help + bark + ward + lead equal?

Click Here To Find Out

What is the next word in the following series: aid, nature, world, estate, column, sense ...? Is it... water, music, welcome, or heaven

Click Here To Find Out

Trivia Contest

December Question...

The 2 ladies that has graced the cover of Time Magazine the most has been Princess Diana and what other woman? 

Your Name:
November Results...

What band was the last group to be conducted by the great John Phillip Sousa, before his death?

The last group he conducted in public was "The University Of Pennsylvania Marching Band". He was then rehearsing with the "Ringgold Band" before suffering a heart attack.

Congratulations to Jerry McCarty and Lynne Rohde who came up with the latter.

Metro Caption Contest

Submit A Caption For This Picture...

Your Name:


E-Mail Our Metro Students

Going away to college can be difficult. The first time away from home, family, and friends. We are going to list some of our students who are away at college. If you have time, please send an e-mail to support our students.

StudentSchoolE-Mail Address
Brad McCartyCentral
Amanda McCartyMiddle Tenn
Sara McCartyMiddle Tenn
November Results


Mike McCarty finds a new shortcut to the Grand Rapids Press. Just cut through the gravel yard and you're there. -A McCarty
I can't believe I just rear ended Rosie O'Donnell!!
-Larry Wendt
Runners Up
This is a short cut to the mall it will be less muddy in a little bit
Throttle stuck again!
It seemed so much easier on the video game
I told him not to push that button
Mike - "I'm Okay"
Here lies Evel Kinevel
Wally: "F#CK"
I'm div'n in!

Who's Getting Married

  • If Bea Arthur married Sting,, she'd be Bea Sting.

  • If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married
    Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.

  • If Ivana Trump married in succession, Orson Bean, King Oscar of
    Norway, Louis B. Mayer, and Norbert Wiener, she would then be Ivana
    Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.

Metro Sound Off

My tire was thumping. 
I thought it was flat 
When I looked at the tire... 
I noticed your cat. 
My tire was thumping too
It was very fright-like
When looked at my tire...
Loved the Metro as usual, but I noticed the Brad Savage picture at the top had been stretched out to make the Savage appear slim. Is this part of the Jenny Craig weight loss program?
ED NOTE: Mr. Speed. There was no tinkering with the photography whatsoever. Brad Savage was always the tallest and slimmest of the Cockroaches. If you notice, you look kinda slim too in the photo. 

Why Not Sound Off To The Metro


My recent article about Physicians vs. Gun Owners apparently drew criticism from one Metro reader. Apparently this peace loving, gun-hating, country music fanatic disagreed with the number of gun owners and accidental gun deaths listed in the article, claiming the number stated was too low. In an effort to maintain the integrity of the Metro, I researched the facts by going to and below is a summary of the claims and the actual facts: My article claimed "The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000." My article also claimed "The number of accidental gun deaths per year (all age groups) is1,500." The FACTS...

Fraction of U.S. residents who own firearms?...28%
United States population...273,000,000
Total number of gun owners in U.S. is 76,400,000
Fatal firearms accidents per year...1,100

So, before this reader's heart goes "Bang-Shang-A-Lang", he should take a little "Sugar-Sugar" or "Honey-Honey" to lighten up a bit and get the twang out of his butt.
- Defending the Second Amendment in the South
ED NOTE: You just gotta hate taking the twang out of your butt!

The Metro Editor cuts out way too much. I don't think a little porn is a big deal. You people at the Metro are prudes!!!
ED NOTE: Just to show that we at the Metro don't mind getting a little risque, here is a photo of the most popular position used in bed.

McCarty Metro Chat Room

The McCarty Metro Chat Room is open 24/7.

Here is a list of December Chat Times.




Every Sunday



Cockroach Music Downloads

Once again, The Metro is featuring two Cockroach songs this month for free download. The first one was written by McCarty, Balch & McCarty and recorded in 1982. It was the "A Side" of their second record featuring Eric Swan on vocals and is called "Swimmin' In The Secretarial Pool". The second song was also written by McCarty, Balch & McCarty in '82 but not recorded until 20 years later. It was written into the soundtrack of "The Archie Movie". The song is called "Our Car".

Our Family & Friends Affiliate Sites

December Staff

Editor:Thank You To All Of Our Contributors:.
Kelly McCarty

Bob Balch
Gerry Bufalini
Brad McCarty
Dennis McCarty
Jerry McCarty
Larry McCarty
Kathlene McCarty
Kelly McCarty
Margaret McCarty
Mike McCarty
Steve McCarty
Denise Sidor


Joke Of The Month

On a cold Christmas Eve, two starving bums are walking through a alley when one of them sees a dead cat. He runs over, sits down and starts to eat the cat, tearing the meat from its limbs. He says to the other bum, "Hey, I know you're hungry, too. Why don't you eat some of this cat?" "Hell no!!!" replies the second bum, "That cat's been dead for days, he's all stiff and cold and smelly!" The first bum says, "Okay, suit yourself," and continues to eat everything, skin, muscle, guts, all but the skeleton. A few hours later as they are walking down the street the first bum says, "Oh, I don't feel so good. I think there might have been something wrong with that cat." And just then, he pukes up a huge puddle of rotten cat flesh and guts with stomach bile mixed in, all half digested and looking like mush. The second bum sits down next to the puddle and says, "Now you're talkin'! It's been months since I had a WARM meal!!!"

Metro Archives

.....Hurry On Home


Please Note:
The Metro prior to February, 2004
was a quarterly newsletter.

The streetlights are about ready to come on, and the Metro is now on-line.

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Detroit, MI 48228

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